I finally made it to my second day devotional. Of course I was very excited to see where He was going to lead me today. I opened my devotional and looked at the verses...Romans 8:31-39. The extended reading was the whole chapter. Wow! Can I just say that now? He is really showing me how I am to walk with Him.
First off I had to figure out what the book of Romans was all about. Since I struggle with the knowledge and understanding of the Bible as a whole, it really helps me get the meaning of what I am learning or suppose to learn. As I began my research I was at a loss for words. I thought I knew what He's trying to say but in reality I didn't know what to say. I mean, "How do I explain what I am learning? What I am getting out of this?"
I had to take baby steps here. I kept reading it over and over. I'd find another explanation of the meaning of the book and try and put it into perspective. I tossed and turned over words. I wrote things down on paper. They weren't making sense. Things were just running together. Ugh! Chaos!
Do you ever get this way? Never fear though, just keep at it and eventually you will see the light. As I said, my daily devotionals aren't daily. They are stretching into days. I'm good with that though.
Here is what I feel is the best way to explain the book of Romans. It can be divided up into three sections. The first section is the fundamentals, the foundation of the Christian faith. Then you come to the section of how to come to the right relationship with God. Lastly you then learn/read how to live a holy life. Wow, right? As I said, He sure is leading me in a great direction.
I have been asking and praying for three weeks now to help me walk in the faith. Now He is laying out this glorious path for me. AND He is giving me this fire to research, learn, understand it all in order to bring it all together in my mind...for me.
You see learning about God is a very personal issue. It is the relationship that you decide to have with Him. As my sister and I talked about this on the way home from church we both agreed that what I get out of the scriptures may be totally different than what she gets out of them. God decides where and what He wants/needs you to learn, don't you see? He knows your purpose for Him and now He is showing you. Well I'm telling you I have surely arrived at my relationship! Amen!
I may not have my purpose of what He is wanting me to do. I'm okay with that for now. I am sure He will begin to reveal where I am best suited to share His glory. I know that as long as He is inside me, guiding me, walking with me...well then I can conqueror all. Through Him I am more than a conqueror.
Just as I studied His word today in Romans 8:37-39, "No, in all these things we are more than conquerors through him who loved us. For I am convinced that neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons, neither the present nor the future, nor any powers, neither height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus our Lord."
Wow, wow, wow! That's all I can say. I am so moved by Him this week. Everywhere I go and everything I am hearing and learning about Him is tying together. Through my bible study, my devotional, church and just talking with people. I am seeing! I am hearing!
I can't wait to see what He brings me this coming week. God bless you all and have a wonderful week!
Sunday, March 8, 2015
Friday, March 6, 2015
Luke 10
A couple of years ago I was in a book store. I ran across this women's devotional and held that book for the longest time as I searched the rest of the store. I found myself putting the book back down and swore to myself I would be back for it. As it was and we all know it happens, I never returned to get the book. However every time I entered the store I looked for it.
I decided one day to go into the Lifeway store by the mall and yep, you guessed it...there it was on the shelf! Again I picked it up, thumbed through it and carried it while I searched the store. Again I put the book down and again said I would return. Well two weeks ago I DID return and I bought it. I'm sure you are wondering what this book was and why did it have such a pull on me. Honestly I don't know why but He does. He knew all along when I would need this book the most.
The book is The Message:Solo Women's Devotional. I think it struck a cord with me on how this book presents itself in teaching me. I thought it really worked with how I wanted to dive into the Word and how I was going to go about getting the message. On February 27th I sat down to open the book for my first day. It's the story of Martha and Mary. After reading that passage I was to extend my reading of the whole chapter 10 of Luke.
I got all comfy in my chair and read the story of Martha and Mary. I had heard the story many times and have read it a few. I then proceeded to the beginning of the chapter and read the verses. Yep, that's all the happened too. I read it but it just never resonated with me. I even believe I talked to my mom the next day asking her about it. I think I said something like, "Ok mom, I had to read Luke 10 and it's like broken stories to me. It talks about 72 disciples and sending them ahead of Him and then the good Samaritan. Of course it ends with Martha and Mary. What is that all about? It's like a bunch a broken pieces fit into a chapter." Mom of course tried to explain about what was happening at the time. I don't think she understood my confusion.
Needless to say I did not read my second day devotional. Instead this story keep swirling in my mind. Why can't I get off this? Why can't I move to the next day? What is He wanting me to get out of this? I never thought about how I have been praying to Him for weeks now to guide me and help me become a person who walks in faith.
I tried to read the passages over again. Nope, nothing was sinking in. On the third day my mother had called to see if I wanted to spend the day with her and Granny. Sure, why not! I had just pulled up a study on Luke 10 but I decided to get out of the house. So off to the library we went for our first stop. It took my Granny like 2 minutes to find her 5 books. She's a quick one I tell you. She had asked me what I got the day before. I had a few Christian books and an audiobook of a series I started a couple years ago. As we are checking out of course her and mom both talked to the librarian about how sick I have been...blah, blah, blah...how I should find me some books on the issue. Do you see where this is going?
Behold I had actually brought the notebook with the names of the titles of books I wanted to buy/research. They didn't have them in that library but she was going to get them from another library no matter how far away she had to look. Then she said, "He is good. You realize that He did this to you for a reason. Maybe He wanted you to slow down." I didn't think much about what she said. I just thanked her and helped mom and Granny back to the car. We spent the rest of the day at the doctor's office, eating and shopping. Those two wore me out!
This morning however I was not going to be denied reading and understanding exactly what He wanted me to get out of this chapter. Why is He not letting me continue on? I dived right in! I started reading, studying and writing it down. Sometimes I had to go back over the verses to really have it sink in. Then it happened...I was hit smack in the face!
It wasn't just one thing that hit me, several things did and ALL at once. First off I did some research on the chapter of Luke. Who wrote it? What is the message of Luke? Things of that nature. I found out that Luke presents the works and teachings of Jesus and understanding the importance to salvation. Interesting how I was drawn to this chapter. Even more interesting was how my very first real study of the bible was about Martha and Mary.
I know you are wondering, "How this is all tying together? Where is she going with this?" If you combine this with my current bible study, which is Believing God by Beth Moore, you begin to see how He has started and is making a path for me to follow. As I have stated before, I have no problems believing in God. My faith is true and strong. It has always been about the walk.
I believe the difference this time in my bible study is the way Beth makes/helps me interact with the teachings. What I mean is that she engages you through questions, real questions. As I progressed through the study I was questioned on my beliefs, thoughts, faith, etc. I was asked to pray to Him on things I felt where challenges or hindrances. I was seeing where and why I lack the ability to walk in the faith. It's more like being afraid than lacking ability. In the end, or so far in my study, I have been holding myself back due to being rejected.
Rejected? Yes, rejected! In my life right now I am equally surrounded by those who believe and those who don't believe so much. Now these people are very close to me and being rejected by them would be very hard for me to accept. I have waivered in and out of voicing my beliefs and thoughts because of my this.
No more though. I just can't do this anymore! I can't and won't push my beliefs on anyone but I also have just been showed that I still must share them even if you reject me. How? Why? As I read Luke 10 and started to really listen to the words written, I began to hear. I began to see. Just like the 72 disciples Jesus said they would be rejected. They weren't being rejected for themselves but because of Him. People rejected Him!
You see, people who don't sense their need of being saved resists Jesus's message. I can't take it personal that someone is rejecting me and what I am bringing to them. In order for me to walk in the faith I must give them the opportunity to hear the message. You never know, I may reach someone and help them become deeper in their faith and life with God. In return I am enriched and my love for Him grows stronger.
Oh the lights are just popping on in my head! It's like the twinkling lights at Christmas time. He is opening so many doors for me to see right now. I continue the study to the Good Samaritan. Treat your neighbor as you would want to be treated. We have all heard this before but now, it's so much more to me. It's a path. This is how I must walk. It's just the beginning, a start. However each journey must start with a step.
It's all coming together now. As I start into the home stretch and the story that started it all, I am overcome with understanding. My daily devotional asked me questions about Martha and Mary. Questions like. "Where do I see myself in the story? What emotions can I feel? What choices did the ladies make? Where they right? Wrong?" I was then to pray to Him about tasks. To ask him to reveal to me what pulls me away from listening to Him. In the end I was asked to ponder the story. What was the message I was to receive from this?
**News flash** Take the time to make room for Him. In every aspect of your life. We are all faced with tasks and distractions. I was just a few months ago. I was constantly worried about my work and doing a good job. I needed the money to help pay for my daughter's college and my bills so the more hours I poured in the more money I could get ahead. I wanted to get back to running. Any extra time I had I was out there hitting the pavement. Family, life, things that made me smile and happy, Him...it all got thrown to the side.
Let's go back to the librarian now. Do you remember what she said? "Maybe He thought you needed to slow down." Bam! She was right! This huge swirling black hole was swallowing me up. It took me to the ground I will NOT lie. I was very scared for a while.
Not so much anymore. Now I spend a few moments every day with Him. I am pulling out my devotional, my bible, researching verses, writing, studying. I am very new to this and by no means do I know what I'm talking about most of the time. However this feels right and I am learning. I am a sponge for His word and I am enjoying being taught.
My daily devotional isn't a daily one right now. It's more like I read it and then it takes a few days of reading and studying to get the message He wants me to. I'm hoping that eventually I won't have to study so hard and I'll know what he wants. For now though it is good, it is wonderful!
I decided one day to go into the Lifeway store by the mall and yep, you guessed it...there it was on the shelf! Again I picked it up, thumbed through it and carried it while I searched the store. Again I put the book down and again said I would return. Well two weeks ago I DID return and I bought it. I'm sure you are wondering what this book was and why did it have such a pull on me. Honestly I don't know why but He does. He knew all along when I would need this book the most.
The book is The Message:Solo Women's Devotional. I think it struck a cord with me on how this book presents itself in teaching me. I thought it really worked with how I wanted to dive into the Word and how I was going to go about getting the message. On February 27th I sat down to open the book for my first day. It's the story of Martha and Mary. After reading that passage I was to extend my reading of the whole chapter 10 of Luke.
I got all comfy in my chair and read the story of Martha and Mary. I had heard the story many times and have read it a few. I then proceeded to the beginning of the chapter and read the verses. Yep, that's all the happened too. I read it but it just never resonated with me. I even believe I talked to my mom the next day asking her about it. I think I said something like, "Ok mom, I had to read Luke 10 and it's like broken stories to me. It talks about 72 disciples and sending them ahead of Him and then the good Samaritan. Of course it ends with Martha and Mary. What is that all about? It's like a bunch a broken pieces fit into a chapter." Mom of course tried to explain about what was happening at the time. I don't think she understood my confusion.
Needless to say I did not read my second day devotional. Instead this story keep swirling in my mind. Why can't I get off this? Why can't I move to the next day? What is He wanting me to get out of this? I never thought about how I have been praying to Him for weeks now to guide me and help me become a person who walks in faith.
I tried to read the passages over again. Nope, nothing was sinking in. On the third day my mother had called to see if I wanted to spend the day with her and Granny. Sure, why not! I had just pulled up a study on Luke 10 but I decided to get out of the house. So off to the library we went for our first stop. It took my Granny like 2 minutes to find her 5 books. She's a quick one I tell you. She had asked me what I got the day before. I had a few Christian books and an audiobook of a series I started a couple years ago. As we are checking out of course her and mom both talked to the librarian about how sick I have been...blah, blah, blah...how I should find me some books on the issue. Do you see where this is going?
Behold I had actually brought the notebook with the names of the titles of books I wanted to buy/research. They didn't have them in that library but she was going to get them from another library no matter how far away she had to look. Then she said, "He is good. You realize that He did this to you for a reason. Maybe He wanted you to slow down." I didn't think much about what she said. I just thanked her and helped mom and Granny back to the car. We spent the rest of the day at the doctor's office, eating and shopping. Those two wore me out!
This morning however I was not going to be denied reading and understanding exactly what He wanted me to get out of this chapter. Why is He not letting me continue on? I dived right in! I started reading, studying and writing it down. Sometimes I had to go back over the verses to really have it sink in. Then it happened...I was hit smack in the face!
It wasn't just one thing that hit me, several things did and ALL at once. First off I did some research on the chapter of Luke. Who wrote it? What is the message of Luke? Things of that nature. I found out that Luke presents the works and teachings of Jesus and understanding the importance to salvation. Interesting how I was drawn to this chapter. Even more interesting was how my very first real study of the bible was about Martha and Mary.
I know you are wondering, "How this is all tying together? Where is she going with this?" If you combine this with my current bible study, which is Believing God by Beth Moore, you begin to see how He has started and is making a path for me to follow. As I have stated before, I have no problems believing in God. My faith is true and strong. It has always been about the walk.
I believe the difference this time in my bible study is the way Beth makes/helps me interact with the teachings. What I mean is that she engages you through questions, real questions. As I progressed through the study I was questioned on my beliefs, thoughts, faith, etc. I was asked to pray to Him on things I felt where challenges or hindrances. I was seeing where and why I lack the ability to walk in the faith. It's more like being afraid than lacking ability. In the end, or so far in my study, I have been holding myself back due to being rejected.
Rejected? Yes, rejected! In my life right now I am equally surrounded by those who believe and those who don't believe so much. Now these people are very close to me and being rejected by them would be very hard for me to accept. I have waivered in and out of voicing my beliefs and thoughts because of my this.
No more though. I just can't do this anymore! I can't and won't push my beliefs on anyone but I also have just been showed that I still must share them even if you reject me. How? Why? As I read Luke 10 and started to really listen to the words written, I began to hear. I began to see. Just like the 72 disciples Jesus said they would be rejected. They weren't being rejected for themselves but because of Him. People rejected Him!
You see, people who don't sense their need of being saved resists Jesus's message. I can't take it personal that someone is rejecting me and what I am bringing to them. In order for me to walk in the faith I must give them the opportunity to hear the message. You never know, I may reach someone and help them become deeper in their faith and life with God. In return I am enriched and my love for Him grows stronger.
Oh the lights are just popping on in my head! It's like the twinkling lights at Christmas time. He is opening so many doors for me to see right now. I continue the study to the Good Samaritan. Treat your neighbor as you would want to be treated. We have all heard this before but now, it's so much more to me. It's a path. This is how I must walk. It's just the beginning, a start. However each journey must start with a step.
It's all coming together now. As I start into the home stretch and the story that started it all, I am overcome with understanding. My daily devotional asked me questions about Martha and Mary. Questions like. "Where do I see myself in the story? What emotions can I feel? What choices did the ladies make? Where they right? Wrong?" I was then to pray to Him about tasks. To ask him to reveal to me what pulls me away from listening to Him. In the end I was asked to ponder the story. What was the message I was to receive from this?
**News flash** Take the time to make room for Him. In every aspect of your life. We are all faced with tasks and distractions. I was just a few months ago. I was constantly worried about my work and doing a good job. I needed the money to help pay for my daughter's college and my bills so the more hours I poured in the more money I could get ahead. I wanted to get back to running. Any extra time I had I was out there hitting the pavement. Family, life, things that made me smile and happy, Him...it all got thrown to the side.
Let's go back to the librarian now. Do you remember what she said? "Maybe He thought you needed to slow down." Bam! She was right! This huge swirling black hole was swallowing me up. It took me to the ground I will NOT lie. I was very scared for a while.
Not so much anymore. Now I spend a few moments every day with Him. I am pulling out my devotional, my bible, researching verses, writing, studying. I am very new to this and by no means do I know what I'm talking about most of the time. However this feels right and I am learning. I am a sponge for His word and I am enjoying being taught.
My daily devotional isn't a daily one right now. It's more like I read it and then it takes a few days of reading and studying to get the message He wants me to. I'm hoping that eventually I won't have to study so hard and I'll know what he wants. For now though it is good, it is wonderful!
Wednesday, March 4, 2015
Shell-doms?
What in the world are Shell-doms? Well they are random Shell thoughts! It makes sense to me so let's go with it.
I've been slowly waking up to the fact I have not been walking in my faith. Don't get me wrong, faith is what I have truck loads of. I believe He is who He says He is. I believe He can do what He says He can do. All these things come easy to me...where I get lost is how to walk in my faith.
I feel I have been tested for quiet a few years now. I allow Him to come into my life and then I'd let Him go. It was easy to carry on with my regular life than to figure out how to exactly walk with Him in it. It doesn't make sense sometimes but it is how I felt and until recently, I still felt this way. I can't ignore the knocking that continues to grow louder and louder each passing month.
I have started my second bible study. Yes, I am now almost 44 years old and just now am I'm trying to learn about God. It was easy as a kid, you go to church with your parents. Sunday school was the best, you learned all the great stories of the Bible. Children stories of course but it was how I first learned of Him.
I soon turned into a young adult and left home. I didn't return to church for the longest time. It wasn't until I was married and looking at changing my religion with 2 children of my own did I return to a church.
It wasn't the same though. I loved being a Southern Missionary Baptist girl! I loved the church, the people, the preaching, the message...just everything. I stopped going and tried to find a Baptist church. I found one but it just never really clicked for me.
After several years and a divorce I returned to my home. My home. It felt so good to be back home. I returned by myself. My daughter went to college and my son stayed behind with my ex-husband. Hard to make it through the days but I have somehow made it through. I feel I had a little help from Him. The tugging soon began.
I won't go into all the details that got me to this point. The most recent really WOKE me up. It really doesn't matter what or how I got here, it's just important that now I am here. I am here and ready to learn and share what I feel. I am not a person who knows much but I am willing to just dive in. And I am diving head first right now! It feels good and it feels right!
Come along and listen to my journey. I don't know where it will lead me other than closer to Him. And that's not a bad thing at all! God bless and have a wonderful day!
I've been slowly waking up to the fact I have not been walking in my faith. Don't get me wrong, faith is what I have truck loads of. I believe He is who He says He is. I believe He can do what He says He can do. All these things come easy to me...where I get lost is how to walk in my faith.
I feel I have been tested for quiet a few years now. I allow Him to come into my life and then I'd let Him go. It was easy to carry on with my regular life than to figure out how to exactly walk with Him in it. It doesn't make sense sometimes but it is how I felt and until recently, I still felt this way. I can't ignore the knocking that continues to grow louder and louder each passing month.
I have started my second bible study. Yes, I am now almost 44 years old and just now am I'm trying to learn about God. It was easy as a kid, you go to church with your parents. Sunday school was the best, you learned all the great stories of the Bible. Children stories of course but it was how I first learned of Him.
I soon turned into a young adult and left home. I didn't return to church for the longest time. It wasn't until I was married and looking at changing my religion with 2 children of my own did I return to a church.
It wasn't the same though. I loved being a Southern Missionary Baptist girl! I loved the church, the people, the preaching, the message...just everything. I stopped going and tried to find a Baptist church. I found one but it just never really clicked for me.
After several years and a divorce I returned to my home. My home. It felt so good to be back home. I returned by myself. My daughter went to college and my son stayed behind with my ex-husband. Hard to make it through the days but I have somehow made it through. I feel I had a little help from Him. The tugging soon began.
I won't go into all the details that got me to this point. The most recent really WOKE me up. It really doesn't matter what or how I got here, it's just important that now I am here. I am here and ready to learn and share what I feel. I am not a person who knows much but I am willing to just dive in. And I am diving head first right now! It feels good and it feels right!
Come along and listen to my journey. I don't know where it will lead me other than closer to Him. And that's not a bad thing at all! God bless and have a wonderful day!
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